These days there is a multitude of angry Americans.
No, wait, angry is too benign a word. Incensed, outraged or infuriated would be more accurate. We see it on the news almost every day. People attacking the police or politicians they don’t agree with.
It reached a crescendo with Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s nomination and appointment to the Supreme Court. A portion of the population was enraged and seemingly out of control. We all saw the pictures of women (ladies?) clawing at the doors of the highest court in the land. To me that looked like a scene from a third world country and not from the shining example of democracy that is our United States.
Just recently I saw a film of demonstrators throwing rocks and bottles at the police while an American flag burned in the background. There has been repeated scenes of our elected officials being harassed as they attempt to have dinner with their families. It seems all decorum is lost and no one is offering any solutions. The right complains about the lawlessness, but does little to combat it while the left seems intent on pretending it is not happening at all. I suppose it has to fall to me to be the problem solver.
To that end I have but one word for you: DONUTS! Not just any donuts, I am talking about warm, greasy, sugary, glazed Krispy Kreme donuts. If the security at the Supreme Court had ordered 10 or 12 dozen hot Krispy Kremes and had them distributed to the protestors who had gathered outside, much of the violence may have been quelled.
Look, I don’t mean to diminish the reasons for the public demonstrations. I understand Justice Kavanaugh was put on the Supreme Court despite accusations of abuse against women. A noble cause for protestors to be sure. I’m only saying it is hard to stay angry while eating donuts.
Do you think those women clawing at the doors would not have taken a time out when the Krispy Kremes arrived? Heck, no matter what I am doing, the odor of a dozen warm donuts will stop me in my tracks every time. I am betting few could resist.
The uniformed thugs of Antifa look and act mean, but I think even they would have to pause for a couple donuts. It is almost impossible to eat hot donuts without smiling. Donuts will calm the savage beasts.
For that matter, I believe our international representatives should consider introducing donut diplomacy to our enemies in places like Iran and North Korea. I don’t see Kim Jong Un turning down a box of Krispy Kremes. I know if I had to deal with a foreign dictator, I would prefer to do it over a dozen donuts.
You know as well as I, you cannot eat glazed donuts without licking your fingers. If President Trump could get President Putin licking his fingers, he would be on a path to a successful negotiation.
I challenge you to try it. If there is someone who is a thorn in your side, casually pass around a box of donuts. A truce will have to ensue if only temporarily.
Look, I know our country is more divided than I can ever remember, and the problems we face are diverse and difficult to solve. We need some common ground and I’m saying that common ground is spelled D-O-N-U-T-S or is it doughnuts? Oh no is that one more thing we can’t agree on?
Dan Smith is on the board of directors for the Ormond Beach Historical Society and The Motor Racing Heritage Association and is the author of two books, “The World’s Greatest Beach” and “I Swear the Snook Drowned.” Email questions and comments to firstname.lastname@example.org or call (386) 441-7793.